Friday, January 18, 2013

Global Warming and Hot Women


A new study "suggest" this global warming thing is due to hot women. The recent data has shown that the ozone layer isn't to blame for global warming trends, and scientists are looking in a new direction - at hot women. Let me explain, back in the day...



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"The human race as a whole is a lot more attractive than it used to be," states Dr. Goodstuff, a climatologist at the Hollywood Center for New and Weird Weather Patterns.



Oddly enough, the two-piece swimsuit—which usually consisted of a structured halter top and modest bottom that covered the navel, hips, and derri arrived with much less fanfare than the bikini. By the early '40s, film stars including Ava Gardner, Rita Hayworth, and Lana Turner were all wearing the two-piece, and it was seen frequently on American beaches. Hollywood's Hays production codes allowed two-piece gowns but prohibited navels on-screen. 
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"With new advances in technology, women especially are able to use clothing, makeup, and surgical techniques to change their appearance and become more visually pleasing. This causes a physiological reaction in men that raises their temperature, and more of that heat is radiated into the air, thus raising the ambient temperature."




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First Ladies and the Connection to Global Warming


Historical data shows that average global temperatures remained stable until the 1960s. During every decade since then, average highs have risen several degrees. Women's studies show that it was around that time that hot women became more liberated in their grooming habits due to sociological struggles and the availability of synthetic materials. 



Women who were previously thought of as homely gained the ability to dramatically change their appearance and transform themselves into irresistible sex symbols. As men experienced their own sort of sexual revolution and it became more acceptable to openly view women as sex symbols, a noticeable shift in weather patterns started to take place.




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In already warm parts of the US, the rise in day-time temperature means more outdoor activities in the sun for young women. As the summers have gotten warmer, shorts have gotten shorter and bikini's have become smaller. This translates into more time in the sun tanning, playing beach volleyball, and skinny dipping, which in turn has led to further gawking and further warming. "It's a vicious cycle," says Dr. Goodstuff


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The ozone hole that destroyed mankind

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47 comments:

Allan Collins said...

A theory which deserves much research and I would be happy to participate - acedamically, of course.

Fritz said...

And thanks for the link, of course!

Dale Weeks said...

The science is settled!

Anonymous said...

It may be related but not causative. Previously it has been conclusively demonstrated that the more stratified the society the more attractive the women. Simply put when the best chance for women to advance is by being attractive, women put more effort into being attractive. Why would a woman spend years learning to be say a nuclear physicist if the option is available for her to give a massage to Al Gore and make more in one lawsuit than she could in a career?

Anonymous said...

I, for one, salute our new hot overlords.

GOODSTUFF said...

Thanks Glenn Dude, you make this blogging stuff worthwhile
great site for up to date news and the like - http://pjmedia.com/instapundit/

Thanks Fred, for being Fred Dude. It's all ways fun to check your
NSFW site for the latest and greatest stuff - http://extragoodshit.phlap.net/

Also, I would like to thank all the folks that stop by to read my blogs. It makes me feel good

Anonymous said...


I thought the settled scientists said global warming was due to water vapour amplification? Now you're saying it's cup size amplification?

A Man For All Seasons said...

So the fact that so many women are now overweight explains why the global temperature has leveled off over the past 10-15 years? It all makes sense.

Steve said...

There is a complementary explanation as well. The number of Baby Boomer women going through menopause has a close correlation with the temperature too. The recent fall of in high temps are for those who have finally gotten over their hot flashes.

Christian J. said...

Reaching in desperation for an explanation why the world has not warmed for the last 16 years is now getting ever more desperate. Maybe an explanation about the energy used to produce all those "Hot" women's products would actually have made some sense. Unlike this comedic example.

Anonymous said...

So let me see if I get this, the hotter the atmosphere the hotter the women and the hotter the women the hotter the atmosphere. Its a climate feedback loop. I knew it!

Now check these cha-cha heels.

klem

Kyle said...

Aside from success in work, women are some of the things that catch the attention of most men. They are the reasons of they strive in life and look for ways to succeed. Learn the ways on how to be attractive to women.

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GOODSTUFF said...

some funny stuff!

Global Warming Make Good Women Go Bad

http://fritz-aviewfromthebeach.blogspot.com/2013/04/global-warming-make-good-women-go-bad.html

GOODSTUFF said...

Just When You Think Democrats Couldn’t Possibly Get Any Crazier …

http://theothermccain.com/2013/05/01/just-when-you-think-democrats-couldnt-possibly-get-any-crazier/

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Anonymous said...

Aw, this was an exceptionally nice post. Taking
the time and actual effort to generate a good article… but what can I say… I procrastinate a lot and never seem to get anything done.


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Anonymous said...

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Verlene said...

This is cool!

GOODSTUFF said...

From an MOST COOL DUDE!

this post supports my theory about global warming...

http://proof-proofpositive.blogspot.com/2013/07/sex-in-advertising_23.html

Soylent Green said...

I think more research is required. It shouldn't be HARD to get a grant.

Lorena said...

I have more beautiful girls on my blog. Girls and women with big ass, big boobs and charming eyes. My girls are perfect and are from around the world. Every day I add new beautiful girls for you.